Machine Gun Kelly, the 35-year-old singer and rapper, shared candid insights into his personal struggles during an intimate conversation at the Grammy Museum, revealing that he sees himself as a “representative of the broken.” The artist, whose birth name is Colson Baker, spoke openly about how his life experiences have shaped both his music and his journey toward self-healing.
Baker admitted that much of his life has been defined by a sense of brokenness. However, he has worked tirelessly to rebuild himself over the years, finding solace in the very vulnerability that resonates deeply with his fans. According to the “Bad Things” hitmaker, fans connect more with authenticity and raw emotion than with those who present themselves as always in control.
“For most of my life, I felt broken,” he shared. “But I’ve been working on rebuilding myself.” Despite his progress, Baker explained that the feelings of pain and struggle have influenced much of his music, and in some ways, he feared losing the creative spark that stemmed from his past torment.
“Sometimes I get a little too scared when the pieces come back together,” he revealed, describing how the rawness of his work often emerged from his inner turmoil. This candid admission highlighted the delicate balance Baker feels between healing and maintaining the intense, emotional drive that fuels his art.
In a vulnerable moment, the artist also discussed how journaling became a therapeutic outlet during his stay in rehab last Christmas. A fan had gifted him a red notebook, which he filled with thoughts during sleepless nights. Writing, Baker said, allowed him to release pent-up emotions and find clarity amidst his struggles.
“It helped me clear my mind,” he explained. “It became a way to manifest my goals.” In fact, Baker shared that he developed a ritual around writing, where he would write down his aspirations and burn the pages on a new moon. He believed this practice helped him stay focused and connect with his intentions.
Interestingly, this journaling ritual wasn’t something new for the artist. He recalled trying the practice before the Grammys a few years ago. Although the outcome didn’t match his expectations, he acknowledged that it kept him grounded and true to his desires.
The singer’s openness about his emotional journey has allowed fans to see a more fragile side of him, one that is not only determined but also remarkably self-aware. As Machine Gun Kelly continues to navigate his healing process, his music remains an honest reflection of the complexities of his life.